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[18 Nov 2008|12:01am] |
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Man...getting a six pack might not be easy, but srsly...some things definitely seem to hasten it...like sex. >_>
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[17 Nov 2008|12:29am] |
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Well damn...I applied for a job with AT&T and got an e-mail telling me I suck. I really want to get the fuck out of Target. It pays absolute shit, and I can't do a damn thing about it apparently. I'm stuck in the same hole with car insurance and credit cards. I'd be good if I got some damn better pay. *sigh* I'm really hoping Chris gets that job at Express...that would be awesome. Plus, I love that store.
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[23 Oct 2008|03:11am] |
Wow...it's been a while. Well, I guess not that long, but still. Life is perfect right now. It really is. A lot of things have happened.
Liz and I are what's happenin'. We've been together everyday since September 9th, XD. It's awesome. I love her so much. I haven't forgotten everyone else, though I'm sure some might think that way, but nah! Umm...yea. I got Rock Band 2 the other day! It's really awesome. The drums are super pimp. I smoke now, but I prefer people hold that information to themselves and not tell anyone, *glare*.
I suck with LJ! But yea...Liz totally owns. I love her so fucking much.
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[20 Sep 2008|12:20am] |
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In relation to my previous post, I have lost faith in a large majority of people.
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[20 Sep 2008|12:04am] |
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So, I'm dissapointed in some of my "friends" at the moment. People are pampering to Sean, never even asking me my side. Of course, why would they? From Sean's side, I'm the big bad wolf that can do no right. And no, I'm not looking for any fucking pity moment, so fuck off with that shit. I'm dissapointed that even without all the information, people are wanting to give me a piece of their mind.
Fuck. You. Man. Don't mean nothing anymore.
I don't even know how some people truly think about it. I asked Brad, but he didn't give an even half-way revealing answer, so that already explains it. Skoot didn't really seem to hold anything against me. TJ and John, fuck the both of you. Annie, I haven't heard what you have to say on the subject, and I would like to know. I'm tired of asking people what they think and fucking sugar coating their answers.
For some facts...
FIRST OF ALL, Sean NEVER fucking owned Liz. He seems to think he did, but he did not. That's fucking important to realize right there. Secondly, he was way too affectionate for two friends, especially when Liz didn't feel the same for Sean as he did her. Next, telling someone they can't date anyone until you date them first? Seriously, what the fuck is that? That's like some ancient history bullshit. Giving you the go ahead one minute, telling you to date, then turning right around and pretty much going against it. SEVERAL TIMES. Going through someone's phone...lol, wow. Can't get any lower than that, especially if one considers themself as a "friend."
People are always going to bring up, "You really shouldn't have even shown interest in a girl that Sean was so into." I am tired of hearing that shit. Fucking seriously. She didn't even feel the same for him, I already stated that FACT. Shit fucking happens, and I'm tired of letting people walk ahead of me. I fucking talked to Sean all the way from notifying him that I ended up liking Liz, to telling him I'd date her if I had the chance.
I don't regret dating Liz one bit, and I'd rather die then throw it away. That's all there is to it. I love you all, but if this is going to get people pissed at me, so be it, because this is one of those moments where I am NOT sorry. I'd be damned if I'm sorry for going with my feelings. The day we deny ourselves and our feelings is the day we become mindless drones, and I have no intentions of that. I'd really like for all of you to understand things in both perspectives, and not just one. Also, this isn't directed towards everyone. Just ones where I know they have a problem, but still...I want to know what others think.
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[18 Sep 2008|07:42pm] |
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The eternal song of Liz and I, baby!! Not even the Beatles can sing about this. |
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Soooo, I said I'd talk about it, yet I haven't posted anything yet on the subject ooooof...DUN DUN DUN.
LIZ AND I!!!!!<33333
So, I'd say this all really started September 1st, at Bear's b-day party. First off, I think a lot of my friends don't have the whole story, and that is very unfortunate, making me look like the d-bag. I also don't want Liz getting a bad rep, or I'm going to be pissed. If people really wanna' know, I can tell them the details why WE aren't d-baggy, but I'm sure it'd go right in one ear and out the other with some. First instance, "You can't date anyone until you date me first?" YEA! That's fucking awesome. Everyone should be like that so we can deny everyone how they really feel and what the fuck...just come on.
Going. Through. Someone's. Mother. Fucking. Phone. I don't even HAVE to elaborate on that one. I really don't. If that's not enough, then I don't know what the fuck is. Don't go bitching about respect, then turn around and do something like that. That'd be like crucifying Jesus then praying to him the next day. *shakes head* It's just really fucked up.
Also, I'd really appreciate if people didn't even begin to try and label what Liz and I have. It pisses me off just about more than anything. I love her to death, and even beyond that. It's to the point where I don't know HOW the fuck to say it. I'm just with her and I end up staring. I feel like a stalker, but I can't help it. This girl is beyond gorgeous, the most. Even more than me, come on now. I've been de-throned. I'm hardly home anymore, too. XDDD I like talking about it in person so much more though. I smile as I type this just because the thought of her makes any fucking horrible day a great one. Truth.
She's like, the exact equal with romantic stuffz, too. I haven't done too much yet, and that makes me sad, but what we've done is fucking owange. Well, it's mainly one special thing, but it's pretty much all the time if I were to really think about it. We had sushi at Shogun not too long ago, in a booth in the corner, and we were probably one of the most lovey-dovey couples you've ever seen. We exuted so much love and cuteness our waiter was like always smiling as he came to our table. We're always holding hands, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
The ONLY bad thing is that when I'm at work, I'm not near her. That really sucks. I'm constantly running into the bathroom to check my text messages so I can text her back. Get a message at 12:00, wait 'til 3:30 to check it? Fuck no. Guys...not many people will probably read this, but holy fuck...I'm ALWAYS happy around her...she means everything to me, and I just want my kits to support us. I know it's hard when there are two different views to the situation, but still. She's the best, and she pwns us all. Period. Yes she does. Period.
She loves me for who I am, no matter what at all. People know how self-conscious I get, and it's to the point where I sometimes have it so bad that I feel only my decent looks keeps someone into me. I know it's not like that though. She was the first to actually not even care if I cut my hair...my hair! Of course, we all love it longer, so it'll stay that way, but man...I ramble on and on, but I can't help it. I get so emotional and I really haven't just made an entry about it like this quite yet.
Ok...I got off subject. I'm a poopy, but it's ok. The most romantic thing EVAR we did was this past Sunday. The night before, Bear, Lisa, Mark, Mike, Skoot, Brad, Rach and I went to Rendevous downtown. (Kick ass BBQ by the way.) As we walked around, you couldn't help but notice the carriages. That just SCREAMS romantic...I was sad enough that Liz wasn't with us that night, but I saw that and went "I want to take her for a carriage ride so bad!" Funny how things work. The next day I see her, and whaddya' know, she mentions about wanting to go on a carriage ride, too! It really couldn't have been any more perfect, because ya' know, perfect is well, perfect.
Later that night, I take her downtown and we find one of the prettiest ones. It was like something straight out of Cinderella, but xThe infinite sign. It had the white, dome-ish(?) thingy with blue and white lights going all across it. We walked up to the guy and I asked about it and everything. He was all, "Aww man, don't worry about the price now." Awesome guy. Cute dog with him, anyway. It's dark and we climb up. He mentions he has two tours, an informative one where he talks to us about things we pass by or the romantic one. I tell him no offense, that I wanted the latter. We sat cuddled up together, holding each other's hand, her head on my shoulder, my head on top of hers. I really don't think anything could top that. If it snowed, that'd be the shit, and yea. But still, I was in extreme bliss, we both were. I have NEVER been that happy in my life. My kits...we all love Diru immensely, and that show we all saw was the GREATEST thing in the world, but this took the number one spot. That's just how it is. People were looking at us, and I loved it. I want people to see how much we love each other. You had to have seen it. As I type it, I just can't help but picture it happening in my mind. She's the best. Perfect. I love her with all my being, and it just really can't be said any better than that. I'd do anything for her. Anything.
You're all probably rolling your eyes with my rambling, but stfu! ;-; All I ask people is please...don't frown upon us. I didn't say anyone was in particular, but that's all I ask. We're both happy together and love each other more than anything. Never has someone else made me feel this good before, in numerous ways. I won't talk about it in this post, but I'm not exactly going to be in Memphis for much longer, either. I've gotta' get out. As a motto goes, "Who Dares Wins."
...she's sitting next to me as I type this, and I keep wondering why my eyes are fixed on a screen when she's right there. I can't stand being away from her. I'm always over here, XD. She is the love of my life, and I will never let her go, under any circumstance...I will never let her go. If people somehow just can't agree with this, I'm sorry, but you're shit out of luck. Denying how we feel for each other is basically the same as killing us, and I'm not letting any harm come near her.
So, that's it for tonight. PLEASE! Feel free to ask questions about how awesome she is, how beautiful she is, or anything else. I'll be more than ecscatic to answer them for you. This girl is amazing...
For the carriage ride, you can view them here...
http://www.new.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30010526&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=750118151&id=1512570054#/photo.php?pid=30010529&op=1&o=global&view=global&subj=750118151&id=1512570054
It's amazing when even the word perfect isn't good enough. <333
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[10 Sep 2008|06:12pm] |
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Mindless Self Indulgence - Faggot |
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To my close group of friends, I probably look like a d-bag...However, I want to hear nothing from no one until they're told the whole story, then you can blast me all you want if you would still like to.
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[02 Sep 2008|09:04pm] |
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Soon to be Glass Skin!! |
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Glass Skin > you.
Sorry peeps, that's just how it is!!!!!
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[01 Sep 2008|10:51pm] |
1. It's about time I'm ready to move out again. I can't stand this, but just fuck.
2. My position for getting to see Dir en grey is really looking bad. Thanks to my boss not having a total grip on things, Landon, my days still haven't been approved off. They're black out days, when the real big important day is later that week, Black Friday. I have no clue why I haven't been approved yet.
The tickets are pretty pricey. It hurts a bit to drop $80.40 total for both tickets, but it's definitely worth it. However, while I say if I don't get approved for Diru that I'll quit, in reality I can't. I still have shit to pay. I'll already have about $140 taken out of my account when Uroboros comes out that month, with maybe receiving only one more check inbetween that and the concert. I have shit I have to pay for before I go to the concert, and after I come back. My fear is that by the time Landon finally makes a fucking decision, the tickets will be sold out, then I'll be upset.
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[26 Aug 2008|04:53pm] |
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Sousei no Aquarion - Akino |
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I am very happy to say that not only can I EWGF, which I've been able to do for a little bit now, but I now think(it seems right to me at least)DEWGF!! Woot woot! I'm so happy. Still got a lot to work on though. :/ Yay for nerdy Tekken talk that no one who reads this will know what I mean. Only one word sums it up though, and say it with me, DOORYA!! I ALSO have developed a bit on my drumming skills as well, being able to do things I couldn't do before, so DOORYA, DOORYA!! <3
Life has been good. I can't complain, and I really try not to, but it's a hard thing. I've gotten' into the whole going to school thingy, again. Rachel and I, possibly Brad, will be going next fall. I was going to try and go in the Spring, but Rachel ask if I minded waiting for her in the fall to go, so it's all good with me. The problem is, I have a couple of ideas on what to do, just not sure yet. Being a translator seems really fun. I like the idea of being the bridge between two languages.
Kinda' in a weird phase now too. I wouldn't exactly say a phase, but I dunno. I haven't really dated much in my life, so I kinda' wanna' do that. Not anyone, but I still have a lot of shy moments with girls. I'm really like a young one at the subject. Whenever I met that special someone, if I do, but I believe in it, I don't want to mess things up. Of course, some could say, "But if it's that special someone, it should work out no matter what, right?" GOOD QUESTION! I dunno. Still, I think dating a bit could help in a way, "prepare" me, or something or another. At the same time, I feel like an asshole, because it sounds like I'd just use the time with someone as a way to gauge things, or for lack of a better word, "use" them, but that is something I definitely do not want to do at all. I dunno. *shrug shrug* There was one girl at work I thought of talking to, but certain situations just make it iffy. She closes, I always work in the morning. I've never talked to her, so it'd be pretty awkward if I went up to a girl and went, "I'd like to know you more" blah or something like that. I don't think that's very fair to the person. Either way, I'll end that here.
I've watched two new anime recently as well. Rach and I rented them from Animax. They were "Gundam Seed" and "Aquarion." The Gundam Seed one was actually a movie combing a lot of the episodes together from the series, XD. We were trying to find the volume on the box before we rented it, so we read the description and were like "Sounds like the opening to a series." XD All in all, pretty good, but confusing. The other one, Aquarion, is REALLY awesome. I think so at least. It's actually part one, episodes 1 - 13. I would summarize it, but I don't think I'd do it justice, and Wikipedia exists for a reason. XP Anyhow, woot!
Oh yeah...going into work at three in the morning and getting off at eleven was pretty neat, and Heroes season 2 came out today, yay!
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[20 Aug 2008|11:54pm] |
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I've had way too long of a break from school, and I'm growing tired of it. I would like to get into school ASAP. I have ideas on what I want to do, but they're just that. Ideas. What do you even do in that kind of situation, choosing what you really want in your heart? People usually tell you to pursue the things you love. Gaming, yea. Music, yea. Something with Japanese culture, or perhaps Asia in general, yea. Statistics, yea. But what can you do? What do you truly want to do is a question that really can't be answered that easy. In the end, it's a subject I believe no one can really help you with. I'm trying to decide, but I just can't and it's driving me up a wall. *sigh*
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[28 Jul 2008|06:10pm] |
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YES!!!!! Today is a good day for me. I was able to beat Brainpower, Paranoid, Orange Crush and Cherub Rock on Expert today. I ALSO got through 74% on Won't Get Fooled Again. MWAHA!
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[18 Jul 2008|03:19am] |
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I think nearly everyone has a wish that is just barely out of their grasp. They either come to face that fact or they push on for it evermore. I feel in my heart that I'm in the latter and that there is nothing set in stone. If/When I do pass away, I'll die happy knowing I never lost sight and hope of that one wish and that I stayed true to my heart.
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[14 Jul 2008|05:01pm] |
Today has been one of those "What am I doing with my life?" kinda' days. I set a few aisles today, one of them being "Back to college" and it got me thinking. I do and don't regret not going into college right after high school. I'm a little upset about not taking advantage of the HOPE scholarship, but that's what I get. I never got approved for FAFSA, even when I tried it recently, and I find that to be some bullshit, but of course, the government are experts with money and know how, when and where to distribute it to. Leaving it at that though is a poor excuse of me not getting off my ass and looking for other ways to get money.
I could have gotten' a loan, or even looked for grants. Preferably the latter, and two years later, I'm still decided on which to go for. I could have saved myself two years trouble on just putting in some effort. Alas, c'est la vie, as it really boils down to no one caring since it doesn't deal with them. That's me being rather bitter though, so excuse it if you will. It's just the thought of what I want to do, and what I "need" to do.
I agree it's never too smart to look THAT much into the future, but I think a certain point of looking into it doesn't hurt. I just want to live life as I see fit, but we can't read the future, and I don't want to make it terribly difficult for myself. ELJRLKlj;! I don't like thinking about this sort of thing.
...This is random, but has anyone just gotten' totally bummed out when they are one of the few people who one of their friends doesn't show as much interest or emotion(?) when talking to you as they do with everyone else? I'm sure some have, but I dunno'. Just sucks. I myself am guilty, and it makes me feel bad.
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[13 Jul 2008|11:33pm] |
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My goodness...that MK vs. DC game looks absolutely ridiculous. -_- *shakes head*
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[06 Jul 2008|09:36am] |
So I had two pretty vivid dreams last night. The first one was awesome, the second one was pretty horrifying.
The first one...It only really had Rachel and myself in it. It was summer time I think, and I suggested that we both visit Japan. I didn't have a lot of money, so I kept on wondering how it was possible, XD. Well, instead of flying we went by boat, and I was the one navigating it. Yea, scary stuff. It was pretty smooth sailing and we kinda' hung out and stuff until we got there. When we arrived at some port, it was in this city/town that begin with a 'C,' north of Tokyo. Not sure if there really is a place like that, but ah well, 'tis a dream. Anyhow, we got there and found some hotel. We later got situated, kinda' looked around, and then got on the train for Tokyo...I guess it wasn't TOO vivid, but it seemed longer in my dream, XD.
Now the second one, -_-. It was really weird. I was walking on the sidewalk and this one house had this garden with all these bricks surrounding it in a very pretty way. I went up to look at it, and an old guy came out. I guess he suspected me of doing something to it, but I was just observing his flowers and the like. I went home, which was right next door, and got inside. The living room was dark and I decided to watch some tv, but nothing really came on. All of a sudden this kinda' silhouette of a face appeared and kinda' got clearer and clearer after a while. I was pretty much like, "fuck that" and turned it off. I unplugged it and everything and that bitch outside to the curb.
Well, unfortunately the guy next door decided to have it. One day as I was passing by again(where the hell am I coming from!?) I see that the garden is torn up bad. The bricks look like a car went through them, and it just looks horrible. I look at it and the old guy and I talk. Well, the old lady(which I presumed to be his wife) came outside and just let out the most ghastly scream I've ever heard. She looked really mental, too. Like she went through some really rough shit. Everyone went into the old guy's house(or it was some house, I don't remember, a lot of the neighbors, and we sat there). This one kid ended up screaming super loud, and all I remember was me getting pissed, him calling the old lady crazy, and him running off.
Everyone eventually loves, and it's dark in the living room. It's just the old guy and me. I notice he has the tv in his arms and he's kneeling down, with this back to me. I get up and walk around him, and I see the light shining on his face, and he looked different. He had this slight black drool, and his eyes had like this black puss coming out from them, his eyes being totally white. His skin looked to have very light black cracks in them and he was kinda' foaming. Naturally, I was scared as shit, so I booked it out of there.
The dream continues, and I think he begins to kill some people, I don't remember honestly. Well, eventually the dream goes from that to me doing a whole Metal Gear scenario against lots of people just like him, but they're more like troops walking around the area as security. I have a tranquilizer in my hand and I'm trying to put them to sleep. At one time, three appear out of nowhere, and I try to lay down out of sight a little. I missed a shot, and it put them on high alert, and they started walking in my direction. I was like "J gljl;aj kj;abj;jas! FUCK FUCK!" and just shot the mess out of them. I got lucky and they all passed out. I then sneaked around a bit, and I saw another one approaching. I waited 'til she walked off, and I sneaked into this building. SKOOT WAS IN THERE! I was so relieved. He had some firepower with him or something, and I was happy...the end?
I know, really weird. >_> The guards had the faces of Laughing, Raging, Crying and Screaming Beauties, but looked like how the old man turned out.
(I need to see all of my friends more. I feel like I'm becoming quite the hermit and it makes me sad thinking about it.)
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[05 Jul 2008|11:58pm] |
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WELL! Mr. Baek Doo San, I must admit...You are SURELY quite the best, and I would huggle you if I could!
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[05 Jul 2008|12:41am] |
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Meh, don't know why I had my last entry translated. It's in Al-Bhed, if anyone wants to give it a read.
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